Tell my mom or not?

Discussion in 'Off Topic Discussion' started by Aliyah, Jan 5, 2019.

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  1. Aliyah

    Aliyah Master        

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    So I'm Bisexual and I struggle with coming out especially to my mom.
    Should I Tell my mom or wait?

    I fear she will be very very upset with me! But I'm not quite sure?

    If I should tell her how do you guys suggest I tell her. Something that will make it easier I have no idea what to even sayyyyyyyyyyy
     
  2. Dragon

    Dragon Always stay humble and kind Staff Member                            

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    A mother should love her daughter no matter the circumstance, however if you come from a very traditional home it can be perceived as a negative thing, I would wait for a time when you are both in a good mood and ask her if you can talk to her about something, I came out recently myself as demi-sexual bi-romantic, and I know it can be a scary thing to talk about.
     
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  3. Aliyah

    Aliyah Master        

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    oh wow that's so brave and cool that you did that!
    Tbh no one in my family has ever came out as gay, bi, etc... Sooooo it's got me very nervous and I know when my mom sees gay people kiss shes like "Oh gosh...." Like she thinks it's wrong...
     
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  4. Dragon

    Dragon Always stay humble and kind Staff Member                            

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    Yeah I feel that, I'm also the first in my family, no one else I know of is gay/bi or anything like that in my family. My mom was originally a bit upset, but she got to be okay with it, and now it's not an issue at all, my dad was supportive right away. It might be scary, but if you feel you need to tell her, it's best not to wait.
     
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  5. Michael

    Michael 0x00 Staff Member      

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  6. Satin

    Satin Elite seeker Staff Member                      

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    Just take your time and tell them when you feel ready and most comfortable, more than likely they may already know or have an idea
     
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  7. Sensei Erkka

    Sensei Erkka 20 years old pking coach from finland            

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  8. N

    N ご冥福を祈ります

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  9. Pkls

    Pkls 11/10 Goooood Booooooy                

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  10. Aliyah

    Aliyah Master        

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    thanks
     
  11. xLewiss

    xLewiss Master    

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  12. Aozaki

    Aozaki *Ice Barrage!* Staff Member          

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    Eh I honestly wouldn't have asked advice from a RSPS community in highly personal situations like this.

    But I would say that if this is something that you feel would be best in the open with you and your family then I would say go for it. Yes it may cause a small blip between your mother and yourself, but at the end of the day she is your mother and will have to come to terms with it and move on.

    Whatever your choice be I hope the best,
    -Ao
     
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  13. Aliyah

    Aliyah Master        

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    Appreciate it thank you.
     
  14. Anubis

    Anubis ƒσяυм ∂σмιηυѕ              

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    You're going to get a mostly meme replies from RSPS, especially when it comes to social questions like this.

    And while my fellows who actually take stuff seriously have good intentions, it's a little idealistic for my tastes. Keep your own situation in mind. Yes, you should be allowed to be yourself and fuck everyone else. But if coming out could potentially put you in danger, don't. Wait. Being closeted is a fucking pain. I know. I'm the opposite of Dragon and am bisexual/demiromantic. But if coming out is going to harm your mental health because of your mom or even potentially face other, more serious ramifications, wait. It'll be hard and you shouldn't have to, but it's not going to kill you to wait.

    Only you know your mom and the possible outcomes of telling her. If it's just going to be awkward for a few months/years, but that's it, I'd just rip the band-aid. Sit her down and just come clean. I'd like to say your mom might surprise you, but for every successful coming out story there's at least three that turned out less than ideal. I tend to prime people for the idea. Get a feel of how they feel about the LGBT+ community, if you are with the individual a lot, bring up the topic occasionally, get used to talking about it from an "outside" point of view. Once you feel safe, only then go for it.

    Now I generally just tell people to fuck off if they don't like my sexuality, but for close friends and family, that's hard. Especially when you're a baby gay. Or baby bi in this case. If you're afraid to tell your mom, maybe come out to a friend or other family member first. So you have a support network before tackling some more iffy people in your life.

    Long story short, only you know your circumstances. Just don't sacrifice your safety and/or mental health because you feel pressured to come out. Yes, your mom might surprise you. But then again, she might not.
     
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  15. notsunny

    notsunny Master  

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    tell her ur bi but tell her u play rsps beforehand to cushion the blow
    :)
    jk gl tho :psy:
     
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  16. Liquid Flame

    Liquid Flame Forum Moderator || Ex-SS2 Mod Staff Member                  

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    Thanks Jay, gonna steal some of this for if/when I have any friends in this situation.
     
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